Thursday, August 15, 2002
Married woman, forgotten woman
Yea yea … I have been away for some time. But today I’m back for a few minutes.
It is no secret that I’m not American; most of you probably noticed that because of my orthographic “horrors”, right? In consequence, many of the topics here go around cultural behaviors, and today is no exception.
I have painfully confirmed lately that for American’s men if you are married, you are dead. It would be understandable if we were dead as women, after all I don’t expect from anybody that knows I’m married to pursue me for a relationship but … we are still persons! With the same needs and desires of anybody else to make friends and be consider just another person, and not “Mr. Doe’s wife”.
I know I’m stronger and more independent that most women, and that changes a little my perspective of things but don’t get me wrong; I know where my limits are. Yet still bugs me that any guy that knows my husband totally excludes me from any personal communication by any mean and refuses to became my friend; or, in the best case if the send me an e-mail the cc my husband. From the ones that don't know my husband, even if they are married themselves I, simply, never hear from them again.
I don’t remember that ever happening in my prior relationships in South America so it has to be an American thing. Now why? Can anybody give me a logical explanation?
On a lighter note, no matter how married, engaged or compromised we are we always want to know we are liked and desired by other people. It is just an egotistic thing I guess but it is good to know there are people out there that find us attractive; it keeps our confidence running high.
Guys: please be aware, I’m married but I’m still a person that can act, talk and have an opinion on its own!
Yea yea … I have been away for some time. But today I’m back for a few minutes.
It is no secret that I’m not American; most of you probably noticed that because of my orthographic “horrors”, right? In consequence, many of the topics here go around cultural behaviors, and today is no exception.
I have painfully confirmed lately that for American’s men if you are married, you are dead. It would be understandable if we were dead as women, after all I don’t expect from anybody that knows I’m married to pursue me for a relationship but … we are still persons! With the same needs and desires of anybody else to make friends and be consider just another person, and not “Mr. Doe’s wife”.
I know I’m stronger and more independent that most women, and that changes a little my perspective of things but don’t get me wrong; I know where my limits are. Yet still bugs me that any guy that knows my husband totally excludes me from any personal communication by any mean and refuses to became my friend; or, in the best case if the send me an e-mail the cc my husband. From the ones that don't know my husband, even if they are married themselves I, simply, never hear from them again.
I don’t remember that ever happening in my prior relationships in South America so it has to be an American thing. Now why? Can anybody give me a logical explanation?
On a lighter note, no matter how married, engaged or compromised we are we always want to know we are liked and desired by other people. It is just an egotistic thing I guess but it is good to know there are people out there that find us attractive; it keeps our confidence running high.
Guys: please be aware, I’m married but I’m still a person that can act, talk and have an opinion on its own!
